The first thing the top of the page says is:
"Do NOT throw this away no matter how stupid you feel when reading back on it! This shows an increase in knowledge about life. God is teaching me something!"
I think that I wrote this at the time because I knew that pride was one of my biggest struggles. I used to want to throw notes away that made me look immature because I felt stupid when I would look back on them and was embarrassed at the things that I used to think. I have learned through NOT throwing away things in this journal, that whenever I have done things that God wants me to do and have opened my heart to Him, I have been way less embarrassed to read back over the things that I was writing. I am glad that this was the first thing that I wrote to myself, because it has actually helped me at times to read back over stuff that I have written and see how I've grown or seen an answered prayer, etc.
The next thing was:
"But may they who love you be like the sun, when it rises in it's strength." Deborah in her song in Judges 5:31.
I think this passage from the Bible was inspiring to me because it is an encouragement to me to love God so that I can find my strength in him. It was also inspiring because it was written by a woman. I always feel like I need people around me who are trying to obtain the same goal in order to have the desire to continue in my desire to reach my goal. It is nice to know that other women, even hundreds and hundreds of years ago, were reaching for the same goal of knowing and loving God and that I'm not alone in my fight.
Following that quote was:
"No matter how many times the Israelites rebelled before, God always came to their rescue. Even when it seemed that all hope was lost for them, for they had followed other gods, he still said 'He could bear Israel's misery no longer.'"
This is encouraging because I know that God looks at all people the same and that gives me hope that He will save me from myself whenever I need Him to. He loves me and will not let me far from His sight. That even though I'm an idiot and do things out of selfish ambition constantly, He is faithful to me, just as he was to the Israelites, to come to my rescue. It just reminds me of how loving and merciful He is!
"Can you accept God's will for your life even if the answer isn't what you want?"
Sometimes the right answer (as a person who believes and wants to follow Christ) has come with discipline, but this question has often plagued me (in a good way) and made me very mindful of the fact that once again, this life is NOT my own. I have been bought with a price and I can't just do things I want cause I "feel like it"...I have to do things that God wants me to...because I belong to Him.
"DO NO MESS WITH YOUR VOW! Num. 30"
With this sentence I was trying to remind myself the seriousness of making/breaking a vow to God. I was trying to keep in mind how important it was to make my words count.
Here's the page that inspired this blog:
This blog entry may not have been totally exciting...but I think it's important to look back and see where you've come from and evaluate how you can continue to grow. I don't just want to forget where I've been.
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